HGTV, Call Me!

This past week we (Tim & I, I mean) have squeezed every last bit of life out of our carcasses to move out of our apartment. Between painting the new place and scrubbing down the old one, we have torn ourselves up to make this move happen. At one point, I was on all fours on the carpet telling my sister, "My lower back gave out!" My 4-year-old niece, thinking I was playing around, hopped on top of me. I slammed face first into the ground as my fingers bent awkwardly beneath me. Through a mouthful of carpet I said, "And now my fingers are sprained."

I resurrected many times after incidents like that because, hey, the closets won't paint themselves, right? Every day as we went to sleep at 2 or 3 A.M. and got up at 6:30, we comforted ourselves with, "It's almost over, it's almost over ..." 6:30 would come, and Rain would wake up all, "Hey, guys! So later I was thinking we could go to the park or that fun bookstore where they leave all those books on low shelves for me, but first, breakfast!"

Her schedule never changed, so she couldn't understand why Mommy's favorite new game was, "I'll Lie Here and You Can Crawl on My Head for All I Care" TM. At times I felt like a terrible mom because I would fall asleep randomly during the day, and I had to drop Rain off at my sister's a lot so I could work on the house. My email is backed up and bills are slipping through the cracks 'cause I'm just too tired to deal. Today we're going to clean up our old place, and hopefully we'll be ready to turn in our keys tomorrow night.

What I need to do is get on one of those HGTV design shows & let the professionals deal with this. You know, those shows where they redo someone's house because the person is like a single mom who is a purple heart war vet and now runs an orphanage. The only problem is I need a warm/fuzzy story, so that I get my name put at the top of the list. But without a terrible disease, bankruptcy, or orphan to my name, my chances of a home makeover are slim.

Unless ...

Do they have a show about new home owners who keep getting messed over by service technicians? If they do, tah-dah! I'm your gal. After the whole AT&T debacle, I was done in by enough bad service reps to surely qualify for a show. Not only did our appliance delivery guys have to return both our refrigerator & washer due to shipping damage (thanks, by the way, for scraping rubber on the laundry room walls I just painted, gentlemen), our carpet installers sliced through the wires connecting our newly installed home security system. Of course they didn't tell me they did this (had to have a Brinks guy check it out) because they probably figured I was mad at them already for not ordering enough carpet to finish the house (see you next week, guys!). And the plumber--did I tell y'all about the plumber that ripped us off? And who cleans a chimney in 20 minutes and charges $150??

Blood pressure rising

Forget Deserving Design; I'm gonna end up on an episode of ER.